I was supposed to take the night off tonight. And, God knows I need it. Who ever thought one would need a VACAY from blogging. It’s work, you know?

It’d just be nice sometimes to chill at night and do nothing. Watch TV. Read a book…. But, then, when I actually GIVE myself a night off — like tonight — I kind of want to write something….

Tonight, instead of writing, I could be chilling in bed with the new book I’m reading, thanks to FAB reader, MEL, who wouldn’t SHUT UP about it.

I usually don’t do what Oprah says…. But, there’s a lot of BUZZ about this book; so, as a yoga teacher and as a blogger (and, again, because MEL wouldn’t SHUT UP about it!), I thought I should check it.

…Aaaaaand, I’m loving it. It’s really well written, CLEARLY explains abstract concepts, and it makes a whole lot of sense on various levels (personal, philosophical, religious, political, ethical, etc., etc.). Cheaty HIGHLY recommends….

A good Monday, Fair Gorgeouses! (Can you tell I’m stuck in the 16th century reading The Other Boleyn Girl? Loving it!) Today, I share with thee tales of FIRST MOVIE and FAT fa-freaking LIPS.

With much trepidation, we took the monkey AND the rascal to their first movie:

My GAWRSH, what a FABULOUS movie. Jim Carrey and Steve Carell? Positively SPARKLES. And, O, how I LOVE the whole world-inside-a-spec concept. It’s what I LIVE for. When I was little, I totally thought there were universes in my fingernails, and in the cells within my fingernails. I was such a little weirdo. But, LO, I should have known this book back then…. Maybe I’d have felt a little more, say, normal or something…. Cheaty TOTALLY recommends this movie….

Sorry, I can’t hear myself think. The rascal’s having a wail-a-thon. Freakin’ FRICK. Sometimes — like, on a Sunday night when you’re still battling the world’s wickedest cold — it’s just a little too much to handle. You know? Too much to handle, yes, but s’okay. I must go to him. Await my return, kindly! Adieu for now.

(While I go to him, the monkey will serenade you with her brillers rendition of Alicia Keys’ No One. She’s grateful for an audience other than Mama and JOSH. Revel!)

Uch, MARGE was just drinking from my giant Starbucks mug o’ water. Do you think I can still drink it? Or, do I have to go ALL the way back downstairs and get another? I drink it. Mmmm….

Anyway, here’s the monkey at her first movie:

Popcorn bag was BIGGER THAN HER! LAAAAA!

Here’s the rascal at his first movie:

Kiss his head! Kiss his head! It’s the most kissable head. Seriously. I’m always kissing it. Oy oy oy!

I’m surprised the monkey devoured that entire tub of popcorn (with Josh-O’s help, ‘course) because she split her lip that morn…. Salty popcorn on split lip can’t be pleasant…, can it? Check it (preferably on an empty stomach):

Ow! My poor widdo BABY!!!

There was blood EVERYWHERE when it happened — at my friend Lolo’s baby naming. ALL over her face. On her sleeves, in her ear.

Basically, she fell walking up a stair and bit her lip. She has two perfect tooth marks on her lip, where the teeth went in…. And that lip is FAT, man! My poor baby. But, she was brave, Gorgeouses. So brave.

Look what Josh-O had the NERVE to bring into my house.

I’m never sending him grocery shopping again! …Wait a minute.

By the way, I can’t see what I’m typing because Minden has plopped himself between me and my computer, is massaging my boobs with his puffy little paws and kissing the CARP out of my face! EW, and ddjafskddddddddd he just sat on my hand. EW, and I think he just farted like a bulldog. What did you get into today, Meenot!? Honestly? He never does that. It freaking REEKS right now. Oh, wait a minute. MARGE is sitting over there…looking guilty. Must have been MARGE. Because Minden’s nothing short of perfection.

A-ny-way, as I was saying. Josh brought Oreo cookies AND Maltesers into my house?!? AND, those healthy spelt ginger snaps that I CAN’T RESIST — because they’re supposed to be healthy, so, like, why not eat them? BECAUSE, not so much healthy when you eat the whole bag in one sitting…. Ahem. I think they call it “moderation”? Yea, well, moderation and I have issues. MALTESERS! He brings MALTESERS into my house! And, don’t get me started on ONLY THE BEST COOKIE SANDWICH IN THE WORLD, either. OY!

Enough of that. So, Josh-O is a BIG obstacle in my dieting efforts. But, I’m passing the tests and resisting. And, losing weight. Totally losing weight. One healthy pound a week. So, it should stay off. For good. I’m telling you, exercise is the key! Just do it!

In other news, Josh-O is taking the monkey skating for the first time AS WE SPEAK.

She had so much fun! No, really! LOVED it. Wants to “GO AGAIN, JOOOOSH! C’WE GO AGAIN?” Have I told you she calls her daddy “Josh”?

I feel like I should be there to cheer her on and witness this momentous event in her Canadian life. But, body is still aching everywhere (the down side of exercising right there). Body is run down. To the core. I’m doing everyone, including THE WORLD, a YUGE service by plunking my arse down on this here couch and chilling for as many HOURS as possible. Getting more than two consecutive hours of sleep per night would also be beneficial. But, alas, the rascal has other plans for me each night….

Hey, I finished Eat Pray Love. Miss it already. Am on to new book. The Other Boleyn Girl.

This cover distracts me….

Watching 2 hours of Clive Owen as Walter Raleigh last night inspired me to get right onto this book.

You’re welcome, ladies…. And, YES, totally see this movie. It’s not as good as the first Elizabeth, but CLIVE. Need I say more?

So far so good. If you haven’t read Eat Pray Love, you’re lucky. Because you have yet to go on one incredible journey. The book’s definitely not for everyone. Some people LOATHE it. But, it was paradise for me.

Kay, one more picture from our weekend, and I’m outtie to eat ginger snaps and sleep and maybe THROW OUT the rest of the bag. I know, a waste of COOKIES. But, this is serious business.

Here — took this picture just for YOU. So you could feel like YOU WERE THERE. Because I know you wish you were….

You totally feel like you’re there, right Gorgeouses? Look at those special effects! State of the ART! TRY 1.5 hours of THAT…..

The Backyardigans! We went to The Backyardigans LIVE show on Friday night! It was a wee bit painful, but the monkey LOVED it. BOINGA BOINGA!

Here’s us watching the show….

The rascal was TOTALLY into it, believe it or not! So cute. His little head was bobbing with the characters — following them from one side of the stage to the other. Yeah, he bobs his head when he looks around. It’s too cute!

Oh yeeeahhhh! So, what’d you do this weekend? Reading anything good?

UPDATE: I just forced Josh-O to hide the ginger snaps. I can resist the Oreos and Maltesers because I’m on a bit of a whole-foods kick. But, those spelt ginger snaps have GOT TO GO. He thought I was kidding when I asked him to hide them. But, OH NO! NOT KIDDING. All I know is that they’re somewhere in the basement. And, I don’t go to the basement much because the cat litter and the laundry machine are there.