I can’t seem to write ANYTHING. So much to say, and I just can’t get it together! So much to say — and, oh! It’s my cousin from NYC. I’m telling you: procrastination city over here…. Oh, and, look. Try typing with THIS staring at you:

Actually, I’m still getting over my FLU SHOT, which has rendered me DROWSY, IN PAIN, NAUSEOUS and DID I MENTION DROWSY? How ’bout EXHAUSTED? It was a little unfortunate because I was sick in New York, and we had to go home early from the Museum of Natural History….

Ooops! Sorry, wrong picture — that was Toys R’ Us (LOVE!)…. Here’s the museum….

Yeah, we’d been walking for a while, and then, all of a sudden, my feet felt like they were going to FALL OFF. And, I got f-f-f-reezing and achy everywhere. We had a wedding event that evening, and I totally didn’t think I’d be able to go. And, I was willing to sacrifice the WRATH of Josh-O’s family to FREEZE alone in my hotel bed. But, I ended up popping two advils (which I never do), and I MADE IT!

Speaking of wedding…. I promised I’d share my uggers dress with you! I only managed to get one pinkberry picture — which I took to send to my family back in Toronto. WARNING: it’s frightening. WARNING #2: my breasts are actually THE SAME SIZE; one is NOT impossibly bigger than the other….

I’m really not sure which boob is the actual size…. Anyway, I wish to thank DRESSMAKER FROM HELL for the lovely job on the PLEATS that made me look TRAY fat. I’ve always wanted to be the FAT BRIDESMAID. And, SHE (helped) make it happen. LOVE. Also, if I look like I was punched in the eye? It’s ‘cuz I’m pretty sure I WAS punched in the eye. My left eye was THROBBING with pain all day. Monkey slept in our hotel bed, so it’s very likely I was thwacked in the eye by either a foot, a fist or an elbow. Probably an elbow. Or, a knee. Because, if I remember correctly, Doc didn’t inject the flu shot in my eye….

Fortunately FOR ALL, the kids looked great at the wedding…. Monkey was a beautiful flower girl, and I was TRAY fahklempt walking down the aisle with her while she meticulously and with great seriousness scattered the rose petals….

Awww! I KNOW! And, look at my little ringbearer…. RAAAASCAAAAL! IN A TUXEDO (check the shoes!)!

Josh-O looked really spiffy himself…. Here we are at Rockefeller Center….

(That’s my bad angle. The photographer at the wedding, you should know, made sure I was photo’d at this angle, but with a little less nostril, of course, in all the photos. Which makes me SO happy. Because those are, like, FOREVER.)

We loved being in New York. It’s a fascinating city. We stayed at the Millennium Broadway Hotel in the heart of Times Square….

This picture was taken at FOUR in the afternoon. 4pm!!! It was SO DARK. Eerie almost. Surreal…. Sublime….

Check out that orb! Do you see that orb up there? Ghost?!?!?

Central Park, of course, was my favourite….

Also…. ALSO, the American Girl doll store. We went there to get Monkey the PERFECT gift for being such a great flower girl. EVERY girl who is ANY girl in NYC has an American Girl doll. They. Were. EVERYWHERE. Have you BEEN to this place? It’s insanity. LOOK:

No. They are not kidding.

Dolls. EVERYWHERE. Little girls. EVERYWHERE. And, it’s very serious…. There’s even a freaking cafe (”freak” being the operative word here)….

The monkey came out with this doll….

…whom she named SHIELA (don’t ask because I have NO IDEA where she got that name from…), middle name PEELA. Of course, we got monkey and the doll matching pajamas and slippers — because that’s…what you do….

We TRIED SO HARD to get Rascal a gift, but he wouldn’t take anything! Everything we gave him was THROWN out of the stroller…. See how hard we tried? See?!

Nothing. You know how hard it is to NOT be able to give your kid a gift? I bought him a little toy phone today, though, and he loves it. So, s’all good.

Hey, by the way, check it! I met my first bloggers ever! I’ve never met any bloggers that I didn’t know in real life EVER (oh, except for Toronto private-blogger Lisa B, whom I met in the parking lot at Loblaws). And, I survived. I met the lovely Steph, who quit blogging (wah!), and AmyD, who’s as gorj and fabulous as she appears on her blog. It was AWESOME meeting them. Who knows? Maybe I CAN go to one of the Toronto blogger events? Maybe I CAN go to a Blogher conference after all? Maybe I CAN meet other bloggers in real life? Maybe it’s NOT scary! (Granted, these were TWO bloggers…. not TWO HUNDRED THOUSAND MILLION….)

Highlight of the trip?: Monkey in the airplane. We’re all waiting to get out of the airplane. It’s late. Everyone’s quiet. All of a sudden, monkey’s little voice blurts out loud and clear:

“MAMA, I MADE A STINKY THART!”

Mmm hmm. That’s ma girl. Of course, everyone on the plane was laughing. And, one day she’ll get her “f”’s right….

…but, I’m in no rush….

It’s been going on two days now. So, I think it’s official: the monkey has an imaginary friend! Here’s what I know about him (I’ve been asking TONS of questions):

*He’s male.

*He’s a “monster.”

*More, specifically, he’s a “dinosaur shadow.”

*He lives in a purple and green castle.

*He goes on a “trip” at night and comes back when it’s “up time” — which is a good thing because Monkey does NOT want to sleep with him.

*He’s “a sweet guy.”

*He likes Monkey’s closet.

*He likes Monkey’s mama and dadda (phew!).

*He has a brother and a sister.

*He’s green and gold (but sometimes he’s purple and red), and he looks something like THIS:

That little squiggle there is the letter S, by the way! You can imagine how excited I was when she told me that….

…which, now that you mention it, looks curiously a lot like this:

It’s GORDO. The GREEN AND GOLD DINOSAUR we saw at the MUSEUM on Sunday! AHA! Eureka!

He looks a little different to the front, though:

In any case…. Where the heck did she get his name?

Are you ready for it?

I don’t think you can handle it….

She says his name is….

KYLO.

KYLO!

KYLO! WTF!?

She’s constantly talking about KYLO.

Kylo’s brother’s name (are you ready?) is Avillia. This changes all the time. But, KYLO is always KYLO.

So, we have a KYLO among us.

Isn’t it AWESOME!? I LOVE it.

Meanwhile…. When Monkey finished drawing Kylo for me, Rascal (waited till I was safely busy in the kitchen and) decided to draw a monster of his own…ON THE FA-REAKING TABLE….

Hrumph! Cheaty little rascal…. The KING of all MESSES.

And, yes, I’m aware that I’m the ONLY blogger NOT talking about politics. It helps that I’m Canadian. But, Josh-O and I HAVE been watching the election coverage all evening. It’s obvious who the new president will be, and I am BEYOND excited. So, I think I can go to bed now! But, I’m also very interested in seeing what happens with Proposition 2 on the California ballot…. Looks like Californians are saying a resounding YES. We do need MORE than Proposition 2. But, it’s a start. The AWARENESS this Proposition has evoked is huge.

Admittedly, we did take one break from the election coverage to watch The Tudors (much to Josh’s chagrin) — WHICH was AMAZING.

Jeremy Northam! Jeremy Northam Jeremy Northam Jeremy Northam. LOVE LOVE LOVE! We’ve been having a love affair since Emma…. He did a REMARKABLE job of playing the role of Thomas More in The Tudors. No doubt, he deserves major awards and accolades. He’s now officially one of my favourite actors. Wow…. What an incredible tribute to Sir Thomas More….

I will miss you, Jeremy…. Hopefully, you’ll come back in next week’s episode as a ghost…(just like they do in The Young and the Restless…).

xo Haley-O