I didn’t expect this birthday to be as wonderful as it was. Especially since last year’s was a total bust: the kids wore me out so badly that I spent the afternoon in bed crying. I cry when I’m exhausted. I also cry when I start to think I’ll never have another real birthday again.

I think it was the phone calls that started before I even woke up this morning, and the emails and the tweets, MY GOD, the tweets. I’ve never felt so loved and celebrated. Best birthday EVER! THANK YOU?! I LOVE YOU?!

Each tweet, email, phone call was a gift.

As for me, I bought myself a sterling silver shark pendant for my birthday — in support and honour of Torontonian Rob Stewart and his award-winning movie Shark Water….

Like it? I’m not a fan of the black faux leather part, so I’m thinking I’ll get it beaded into my chakra necklace. Yes, I’m getting weird(er) in my old age. But, you love it, and it will be HOT — trust me. I’m talking HOT. Like, Matthew Morrison hot…GLEE!

Now, as you know, I’m a nature/animal lover. And, it’s my experience that when you give to nature, nature gives back. I know, weird. But, DON’T GO. GET THAT FINGER AWAY FROM THE MOUSE. STEP AWAY FROM THE TOUCH PAD. (I adopted a pig from WSPA’s WILD GIFTS, too, btw, because LOVE…). GET BACK HERE IT’S BEAUTIFUL I PROMISE! Nature gave me a birthday gift. First thing this morning, I stepped out my door and saw this:

Do you see it? Isn’t it awesome? Closer? Okay…. Gimme a sec. Okay, here:

The Spider — nature’s artist, weaver, writer — gave me this. The camera doesn’t begin to capture the awesome beauty. I’ve never seen anything like it. So perfect, magical.

35′s going to be a good year.

That’s me and my chakra necklace at dinner with Josh-O. After dinner, we went to see The Hangover and laughed our elderly arses off.

Love!

xo Haley-O

Nothing like a little art on a Sunday morning to ignite a waning spirit. And, WOW, did Canada REPRESENT today at the annual Toronto Outdoor Art Exhibition (TOAE) at Nathan Phillips Square.

Josh and I took the kids downtown at, ohhh, 10am or so to fit in the entire show before I had to meet it’sgrandma at the mall to buy clothes for BLOGHER (more on that part later). It definitely wasn’t enough time to peruse ALL the finest of Canada’s (and some US) artists. But, I got enough of a taste to get me excited!

One of the things I use my internet “fame” for is to bring Canadian (and “mom”) artists to the PEOPLE. I don’t know why, but it’s a passion of mine. I love animals, and I love artists. So, I “give back” by helping to heal the earth and by supporting peeps who make it extra beautiful. I mean, Earth itself — I always think — is a work of art. So, I guess my two causes aren’t as different as they’d seem….

Check this piece by the brillers Michelle SaintOnge who, in case she looks familiar, is the one who taught Martha Stewart and audience to silkscreen their won bags! Ahh, the eye-catching beauty of the pink ELEPHANT in the room….

OMG love…. I HAVE to have this….

And ZEBRA….

MY EYES. This is too much for them. Oof! Stunning….

Another one of my favourite artists hails from NYC, and AMAZINGLY managed to secure a spot in this very elite art show — so elite that the “reject show” was supposedly INCREDIBLE (I didn’t get to go, but I heard this from friends). Her name’s Tracey Silva Barbosa. She’s a mom of a sweet three-year-old. And I want this painting in my bedroom because it’s dreamy and whimsical and quite simply utter perfection….

I can’t even handle the beauty that is this painting. Particularly the juxtaposition of hummingbirds and bonsai trees, and the numbers and gold ribbons. I love a good mixed media…. One day, I’ll buy THIS ONE….

I can’t HANDLE the gorgeousness….I am SO looking Tracey and her hubs up next time I’m in NYC. They are AMAZING. We had an awesome chat — about Rascal’s stinky diapey, among other things….

THIS GUY was also awesome….

His art is ridiculously realistic. I mean — LOOK AT THAT. And this….

My blackberry (which will soon be a PURPLEBERRY, if I have my way…, or maybe pink camo) camera does NOT do this beautiful art justice, so check Olaf Schneider’s website…. You WILL enjoy. I ASSURE…. I especially liked Olaf because, even though he was steeped in a phone call several feet away from the booth, he managed to nod and wave to me about three times while I was checking out his booth. I really appreciated that he gave me — a short, busty (BWAH!) poorly dressed mom — the time of day. Really. And he’s a SUPER HUGE Canadian artist (just look at his bio page, like OMG).

Of course, since I’m in the biz…, I had to check out the CHILDREN’S STUFF! Among various children’s art booths, I LOVED Mara Minuzzo‘s art — she obviously didn’t realize her graphics aren’t stealable (even via a MAC) on her website, so do yourself a favour and just check ‘em at her website. I love the horses, the black-and-white bed, and the little girl running in the water most! Mara’s not a children’s artist per se, but the deer and chipmunks and the little girl in the water? — would all look FAB in my monkeys’ rooms….

Finally (yes, finally…), I was SO EXCITED to meet Ms. Adrienne Gibb of Fabricawakuwaku, and I’m secretly hoping she’ll join my crew at Kids Deserve Art one day (like maybe when I actually get a professional to design the site…). Her handmade stuffed animals — made with recycled and vintage fabrics (AWE-SOME) — are seriously DA BOMB….

Of course, we splurged and bought Monkey and Rascal each a Fabricawakuwaku “Patch Rabbit.” Monkey chose the purple-and-pink one and Rascal the beige….

…Then she decided she wanted his. So, now he has the purple bunny and she the beige bunny. Evs.

I love that my kids have works of art for toys. Delish!

So, yeah, 1pm arrived SUPER FAST after all the artistic excitement. And, off I went to Yorkdale. I probably should have gone downtown for this new WARDROBE, but the big mall was convenient, and, besides, I don’t exactly want to STAND OUT at the BlogHer Conference (in, like, a week and a half, in Chicago). I kind of want to blend. I, at least, want to be myself. Which means…, you got it…, LULULEMONS. If none of you absolutely object, I WILL be sporting LULULEMONS at blogher. Probably with one of my signature funky tees and black running shoes. And, baby, it’s a BITCH to find black running shoes that aren’t leather. SO, I will be heading downtown some time this week to check what I’ve heard is one of the world’s best vegan shoe stores — right here in TO.

…Seriously, we looked at every shoe store in the mall. The salespeeps in one store even INSISTED that a pair of black canvas wedges would look HAWT with my Lulus. But, ermm…, NO. All the other canvas shoes in the mall were TOO FLAT, or too RIDICK….

I need the height — believe me — but I don’t need it THAT bad. I’m no TOM CRUISE.

I can’t BELIEVE how long this post is. I feel like I’ve been writing it for 20 years. SO, in case you haven’t had enough of my writing today, go check my ANOTHER post of mine over at Canada Moms Blog — “I’m not Pregnant. Just FAT.”

But, feel free to leave a comment here. I notice comments are lacking on ALL my fave bloggers’ blogs, and WE LOVES THE COMMENTS! Especially when we write long-arse posts…. We are a sensitive, needy people.

Love!

xo Haley-O

First of all, I have SO MUCH NEWS. And since I know you all want to hear about the finger-in-nose incident, I’ll be like The News and save the story with the most buzz for the end. So, you all have to read all this WORD FOR WORD first, okay?

FIRST FIRST. I have to mention a very important person: Cathy. The very first Kids Deserve Art artist. Look what she worked SO HARD on — to get out in ONE day so a little girl would have it on her birthday….

(As the wise old woman who taught me to teach yoga used to say in thick French accent…) CLOSER-CLOSER….

The little girl’s name is MADISON. How CEWWWT is that? Way to go, Cathy!

My little company Kids Deserve Art has been BU-SY lately. And we’re proud to say we’re having a great presence at two major Toronto children’s charities this month: earlier this month, we rocked the Silent Auction at Sunday in the Park with Lilah and, later this month, we’ll be rocking the Silent Auction at Bike for Tykes. I’m obviously really proud to be involved in these charities. Look for us at Bike for Tykes at the end of the month!

NEXT ITEM! My day (and night) job, bTrendie is sponsoring the MamaPop BlogHer party…. Check…IT:

See us? In the banner! Isn’t it pretty? SPARKLES! I have yet to put it on my sidebar. But, isn’t it GORJ? We’re also sponsoring the PEOPLE’S PARTY, and we have HOT-ARSE (that’s a hint) surprises in store for the Room 704 party. Yes, the company for which I am DIRECTOR, MEMBERSHIP & COMMUNITY is officially TAKING OVER BLOGHER.

And, whatchoo tellin’ me? You haven’t joined yet? DUDE? Support CHEATY! Heh. If you want to join, go to bTrendie and use ma code: CHEATY to get in. Love! …and thanks.

Okay, enough shameless self-pimpin’. Time to pimp some other peeps. So, last Thursday, I took my mom “it’sgrandma” out for her birthday….

First, I took her to Kristen Ma‘s LAUNCH party for her NEW BOOK, Beauty 2.0: A Holistic Guide to Natural Beauty for the Modern Age:

And my mom was so proud when I was chatting with the author herself and taking many photographs with her to get one half-decent good photo (I is un-photogenic!)….

Look at it’sgrandma in the background there. SO PROUD of me. Heh. My hair, by the way, definitely did NOT look that unbrushed. Although, come to think of it, I did go to the launch straight from a full day at the office; so maybe it was that disheveled. And, will you look at Kristen’s SKIN? Wanna get that skin? (BIG PIMPIN’: ) I’M GIVING AWAY THREE AUTOGRAPHED Beauty 2.0 books — filled with all Kristen’s GOLDEN secrets — to give away over at GOODIES later this week…. If you can’t wait for our contest, you can buy one at Amazon….

Kristen is the co-owner of Pure and Simple, aka my second home and the ONLY skincare and cosmetics lines I TOUCH. With a 10-foot pole. Isn’t she gorj….

So, the launch was held at Pure and Simple. It was FABULOUS. There were gorj ayurvedic platters set out (in keeping with her book), CUPPING sessions, makeup artists, and an ayurvedic doctor….

…the very Ayurvedic Doctor who stuck his fingers up my nose. Dr. S. R. Sharma. I met him at the launch. Yes, he took my pulse and told me….

“YOU ARE DOMINATED BY KAPHA!”

So, of course, I made an appointment immediately. I mean, no wonder I’m STILL not at the weight I’d like to be since Rascal was born. No wonder I’m often sluggish and tired. No wonder! I’m DOMINATED by Kapha! (And, so you know, us yogis take our ayurveda very seriously….)

Sooo…, the next day, I went to see Dr. Sharma. He treats all the celebs, apparently, so I knew I was in good hands…. Check him (fully posing for the pic, by the way — I asked him to) studying my info:

LOVE! After I told him my life story (kind of like how this post is turning into a LIFE STORY – EGAD – I’m. still. writing.), and then some, he determined that I am DOMINATED BY KAPHA and have a slight VATA imbalance. So, he got me to lie on this bed….

…and he did all this cool energy work on me.

…including….

STICKING HIS FINGERS UP MY NOSE!

Of course, I wasn’t prepared for it. But, I’m a yogi. So, I maintained my SAVASANA pose. And, I ACTUALLY DID NOT REACT! I just lay there — still with a straight, relaxed face! I surprise myself! Also, I was too busy marveling at the strange, like, camphor smell and the COLD sensation inside my nose…. For the rest of the session, I was thinking about my COLD nose.

AFTER the session, I asked Dr. Sharma about my nose. What is that smell? Why is it cold? What did you put in there? He said “NOTHING”! Apparently, he put NOTHING in my nose. He simply moved the energy around to create the sensation. And, then, when I thought of it? I realized the smell was the that dang CRACK I’m addicted to — STARBUCKS CHAI TEA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (I think that’s enough exclamation marks.)

He told me to look at his fingers, smell them. NOTHING. There was NO balm on them. NO trace of chai balm on them, Gorgeouses!

When I got home, my nose was still cold on the inside, especially when I wiggled it. So, I asked Josh to smell my nostrils. Were there any fumes emanating from them? NO. None.

So, anyway, to make a long story short(er)…. I have to go back to the centre for 5 days in a row for a FULL-ON cleanse. Wish me luck. Sharma better not stick his fingers anywhere else without warning. Eek! You never know! He wouldn’t! Right…!?

Okay, so, I’ll keep you posted on how that goes. Time for bed. And someone’s calling my name….

“MAMAHHHH!”

He’s teething. Looks like it’s going to be ANOTHER night of no sleep.

Stay tuned for the big BEAUTY BOOK contest. Coming later this week. Maybe even tomorrow, if I’m not too Kaphic….

Love!

xo Haley-O

The view from my toilet….

The view from my bed….

The view from the upstairs hall….

The view from the back window….

The view from the back window (not in time to catch the WILD TURKEY!)….

The view of the sunset as I worked at my computer….

The view of the sunset….

Isn’t it beautiful? Josh-O practically had to drag me by the HAIR to the country. I just have SO MUCH TO DO here. Always so much to do. But, obviously, it was worth it. I wished we could have stayed longer because it was just so beautiful. It was so mind-clearing to have SO MUCH SPACE all around me. Nothing but white, and trees, and happy, frolicking squirrels and WILD TURKEYS, and birds and, somewhere out there, coyotes….

Although…, it is quite possible that my father in law and I would have killed each other had I stayed a little longer. It’s really my fault, though. I am so irritable and flipping angry on no sleep, and anxious in general, and don’t get me started on Sarah Palin’s aerial wolf slaughter* and anti-conservation agendas because there are no good reasons for that and the whole thing makes me FURIOUS. I love wolves. I mean, LOVE wolves…. (Did anyone catch Ashley Judd and Defenders of Wildlife’s President Rodger Schlickeisen on Larry King Live this weekend? They did a really great job. Applause!)

Sigh….

To make myself feel better, I (finally) bought some new clothes today. I’m teaching so much yoga these days that I need more than ONE (ratty black) HOODIE to schlep around in, don’t you think? So, we went to Old Navy, where the perfect hoodies come out to play. I thought I was going to get another black one — since I love teaching in all-black — but I got daring. Check what I bought!

Le SPORTY….

Le PURPLE….

It’s bright! Bright purple! But, I need a little more bright in my wardrobe (and to run a BRUSH through my hair before self-photographing — no, I will never learn!)….

Of course, I also got myself another NEW black hoodie (a staple for me, really) and a couple tight-ish tees. The hoodies are TRÈS tight on me — all the more incentive to lose these last 15 pounds. Especially since my 21-day cleanse ENDS TOMORROW! Will I have the MUCH MISSED Starbucks soy no-water chai tea latte, WHICH I haven’t had in TWENTY-ONE DAYS? Or, won’t I? STAY TUNED! Please try to discourage me from ever imbibing that thing again, though?! PLEASE. Begging.

LOVE!

xo Haley-O

*…and bears, and their cubs. For more info, or to take action, go to http://eyeonpalin.org or, of course, to Defenders of Wildlife. Thank you….

Contest over at Goodies — check it!

So, I’m psychic now. (Work with me here.) I can’t tell the future or anything, mostly because I don’t believe the future’s set in stone. But, I’ve been more open to spiritual experiences. And, you know, the yoga and the stones and the meditation — all of it opens your mind up to experiences beyond the mundane.

It’s GREAT being psychic more spiritual, let me tell you. Life is TRAY more exciting. But, problem is, it’s affecting all my MACHINES. Like, for example, yesterday, I took Monkey and Rascal for a walk, and I had this, erm, experience, and WAMMO, my IPOD went bust. Oh, don’t worry — Josh fixed it, thankfully (for whatever would I do SANS IPOD?). And, then, today? Less than 24 hours after said experience occurred, my email — ALL MY EMAIL LIKE EVER — disappeared! I’m serious. I opened my email program to find the peeps from Microsoft inviting NEW EMAIL USER to set up NEW ACCOUNT. Sweet. NOT SWEET. Oh, don’t worry — Josh fixed it.

Speaking of Josh…. He has just watched two episodes of The Young and the Restless and, now, my favourite show — THE TUDORS — with me. It’s the least I could do to repay him for putting me through too many of HIS shows. My days of Fringe, Prison Break, Dextor, and, what else, 88 MINUTES (can you believe he rented THAT for us, FOR ME?), ARE O-V-A-H OVAH! I fully blame 88 Minutes for that HORRIFYING nightmare I had the other night.

And, HENCE, you can BLAME Josh for yesterday’s intense and disturbing post because if we hadn’t been watching HIS Prison Break show, then I wouldn’t have searched for a picture of Wentworth Miller, and then I wouldn’t have found that HORRIFYING video, and I probably would be eating dairy and eggs still. But, alas, this is my fate: animal lover, animal helper. It’s no wonder that, on that walk I took with the Monkey and Rascal, I saw this beautiful cat (that looked just like my Simba!) way up high in the vines on the side of a house….

Do you see her? She’s in there somewhere. Here, try this pic….

See her? See the birds taunting her? Probably not…. They were sooo, like, “ha ha! come and get us!” It was WILD!

The cat’s owner joined us as we watched her — all of us hoping she’d make her way down. And, you know what the cat’s name is? Angel. That cat’s name is Angel….

I’ll leave you to deduce the beautiful, rather intricate, syncronicity of ALL of this (or not)…. It’s a stretch, but it’s there…. And, yeah, it was then that my Ipod went bust for the first time EVER.

And, it was shortly thereafter that I was hit over the head by my cause….

Anyway, I spent some time reading up on my new diet this morning. With Rascal. In bookstore. If you’re going to go vegan, you HAVE to make sure you’re getting all the nutrients, etc.. So, a little homework was in order. Homework, however, was not without its adorable distractions….

It wasn’t as relaxing as the previous picture suggests. The kid doesn’t sit still. Ever.

Did you see his lil Nikeys? He is TOO. MUCH.

By the way? GREAT day today. GREAT. He slept for 5 minutes. And Monkey crapped her pants while I was teaching yoga. The poor woman who was watching her was KIND enough to clean up the (warning: understatement) mess. I want to give her a little gifty. She’s not into Starbucks, but she does love reading books, so I’m thinking Big Bookstore (Chapters / Indigo in Canada) gift certificate?

P.S.: More updates to come on Cheaty Recommends. I have some little yoga pieces I want to share, for example, and some recent movie rentals. Will get to it pronto. And, to make helping my cause easier for everyone, and by popular demand (THANK YOU!), I’ll be posting several vegetarian recipes on Cheaty Kitchen also pronto. I have several contests lined up, as well, but am still in “just chillin’” mode….

There are some people who should NOT be watching violent movies, TV shows, or even reading violent books. Some people shouldn’t even DARE turn on the news or open a newspaper. The radio is quite enough thankyouverymuch.

And, when they say “The following program may contain scenes of violence. Viewer discretion is advised”? YOU BETTER BELIEVE that sh– is VIOLENT. And, SOME PEOPLE should NOT be watching it. “Viewer DISCRETION”? My arse. VIEWER BEWARE. Because viewer be having SERIOUS wake-up-screaming kind of nightmares. Like I did last night.

Ever had the kind of nightmare that’s SO REAL, and you want to scream, BUT YOU CAN’T? I think I tried to scream three times before, FINALLY, “JOOOOOSSSSSHHHHH” escaped my trembling lips. On went the light. And, I was brave enough to take a nervous peek under my bed.

Even AFTER having a nightmare like that, I’m now watching Prison Break. SO HELP ME GOD. I tried to convince Josh-O that he hated that show, but NO-O-O, Josh-O insists he loves it. And, so, I just watched a CRAZY WOMAN torture a CRAZY MAN and all sorts of CRAZY violent other stuff.

It’s a good thing Wentworth Miller is DANG hawt….

But, then, just as I go to one of my fave gossip sites to find the best possible picture of Wentworth (which, of course, the above IS NOT). I find a worse horror. A video of what’s happening on “factory farms” so that people CAN HAZ burgers, chicken fingers, bacon, etc., etc.. It’s NOT OKAY.

I knew things were bad. But, now I have more visuals tormenting me and keeping me up at night — after I pray, as I always do, for the comfort of the animals.

As of this moment, I’m no longer a vegetarian. I’m now a VEGAN. It’s the only thing I can do for my beloved animals right now (I also donate monthly to WSPA).

I am CRYING.

And, perhaps, another thing I can do is to gently encourage you (if not to go all out vegan like me, then,) to eat more vegetarian meals, and to look for the words FREE RANGE on your egg cartons. If possible and affordable, opt for organic dairy products, buy your animal products from organic butchers or, at the very least, buy meats that are hormone and antibiotic free (assuming the conditions aren’t bad enough to require antibiotics). As Jane Godall said, “everything you buy is a vote” (Harvest for Hope). Vote for the smaller farmers….

I know money’s an issue for everyone right now. Imagine how much money you’d save eating less meat….

(At the very least, give thanks when you eat animal products…. My family laughs at me when I insist they THANK THEIR FISH, but they do it anyway, and I think they mean it.)

Because it is NOT okay. NOT okay. NOT okay.

You might shut me down and insist “HUMANS ARE MEANT TO EAT ANIMALS,” and I’ll give you that. But, humans are also meant to RESPECT ANIMALS. To f-ing RESPECT THEM. Apparently, that’s too much to ask.

Since MOST PEOPLE can’t handle the video footage of the horrors of factory farms, I just saw the video for you (well, as much as I could watch without smashing my computer on the floor and ripping my hair out in AN ANGER I HAVE NEVER KNOWN BEFORE). And, just trust me: NOT okay.

NOT okay NOT okay NOT okay.

Everyone has to choose his/her own cause(s)…. I understand that. Just, this is a big one for me. Thank you for listening and letting me do this small thing for my cause….

May all the animals on this earth find peace and comfort tonight….
xo Haley-O