The husband was away. I wrote two articles this week. Nine or so celebrity blog posts. Interviewed another celebrity last week. Went to another event today. Haven’t been to yoga. Haven’t been eating well. Haven’t been going to bed at reasonable hours. The Rascal graduated from preschool twice. The Monkey graduated from morning school, had a dance recital, a theatre performance, a park party, school cookout and has another graduation Friday. I apply a bottle of sunscreen a week to myself and my squirmy children. We’ve lost two hats and three pairs of shoes.

So I’m not going to write anything today. Today we’ll just chat. Grab some ice water. I hear it’s not very good for your kidneys to drink ice water, or your digestion, but it’s hot in here. So go grab a glass. Maybe squeeze some lemon in it — I need to cleanse. And I’ll share some pics from the last while. Because, as far as writing is concerned? I don’t have a word left in me. That, and I’m seeing doubles trying to keep up with my personal email, work email, my Twitter, Twitter, Facebook, Facebook, blackberry, macbook, work computer and now the new PlayBook that Best Buy kindly gave me because, among other things, I really needed another gadget to check things on, and the Rascal really needs another thing to YEARN and throw window-breaking-loud tantrums about.

What’s the deal with boys and games, anyway? He’s been begging for an “iPot” since he was two. Poor guy NEVER gets to play because I’d rather see him do low-tech things, like colouring or kicking a ball. But, yes, he does enjoy the “finger slide,” whenever he gets the chance, every now and then. But he does think my new PlayBook is for him.

Anyway, how’s that ice water. Mine’s great. Gulp gulp. So here are some pics from some of the last week or so since I’ve blogged, you know, since I’m flat out of words. So, Gorgeouses, checkit….

Rascal, the reality TV star!

For the full scoop on the Rascal, Tori Spelling, the kids and my interview with Dean McDermott (and, come on, Dean haters, everyone makes mistakes — he was LOVELY), go to Celebrity Candy. Grab some vegan candy, enjoy the story, and I’ll wait right here….

What’d you think of those pics! My hair. I know. It was WINDY. I have since rediscovered my hairbrush. The barrage of complements I got on my freshly brushed hair today have incentivized me (I know that’s not a word) to use a brush more regularly.

Get your minds out of the gutter, Gorgeouses, IT’S A FISHING ROD WITH A FISH ON IT. The Rascal asked me to hold it while he enjoyed his organic lollipop.

FISHING ROD!

Look out for our Rascal (and me!?) on the next season of Tori & Dean: Home Sweet Hollywood. Ha!

The cottage.

I’m going to go get more ice water. While I’m gone, check out these pics from the cottage last weekend. I feel really lucky that my parents let us use the place like it’s our own…. We don’t hold back….


Bygones…!

Tomorrow I’m meeting with Warren Kramer for a private macrobiotics counseling session. I’ve fallen off too many wagons lately, and I’m feeling it! My friend Alice would say I’m too yang. Way too yang. My yoga teacher David would say, “Don’t let the vrittis win.” They won. I can’t bring myself to go back to yoga now that Josh is back in town…. I’m just exhausted. So I’m hoping Warren will give me a nice, cushy, energizing, happifying wagon to stay on long term. We’ll see.

Love!

xo Haley-O

Photos of Tori, Dean and the kids: Haley Overland/TODAYSPARENT.COM

 


Aside from feeling “nudged” (which is a Jewish term for wanting to eat even though you’re not hungry), I feel great. And it all started last Thursday.

I’d been meaning to prepare you for the event. But I didn’t get around to it, and I didn’t want to think about it. Which is also why I didn’t crash diet for it — and I totally meant to and I totally should have. Instead I think I ate more, and chugged at least a chai a day to numb myself to what was to come….

Yeah, you know those layouts in magazines where they have a girl in tight clothes demonstrating workout moves? You know the ones. Usually the girl is really svelte with nary a nugget of flab. Well, Today’s Parent Magazine selected moi for such a role.  And I agreed.

The thing is, not only did I agree to do a layout, but I also agreed to do the VIDEO for TodaysParent.com. And, apparently, there is no airbrushing a video. And that “slimming lense” that Andrew Dunlop, our web editor and video master, told me he’d use for the shoot? Doesn’t in fact exist. Aaaaaandrew!

That’s Andrew. I snapped that shot when we got to The Shopping Channel headquarters, which was where the photo and video shoots took place. Why there, you ask? Because that was where the guy who was going to show me the MOVES was advertising his new products: Harley Pasternak.

You may have read about him in the gossip mags, when the stars talk about their diet and exercise regimes, because he’s worked with most of them. His insane list of his star clients includes the likes of Halle Berry, Natalie Portman, Orlando Bloom, Megan Fox, Jason Segel, Kate Beckinsale, Robert Downy Jr., Jennifer Hudson, Paul Rudd (my new crush), Katy Perry and Jessica Simpson….

…and now me!

Here’s Harley and me posing for my blog….

I really shouldn’t smile in pictures. Not only does my fake front tooth look horrid (I’m getting the bridge in just a few weeks woohoo!), but my cheeks balloon out like my 5-year-old’s….

See, here’s a picture of me not smiling (granted a little distorted, but you can still see the difference)….


Got my hair and makeup did by the gorj Michelle Rosen and sweet outfit styled by the gorj Vanessa Taylor.

And please don’t get all “Haley, you look AMAZING” on me because even I can say I look slimmish in this photo. But there’s a sizable leftover-pregnancy pot that you can’t really see in that photo for some reason. You’ll see it in the video (trust me — it’s going to be SO embarrassing), and possibly even in the photos.

Anyway, that photo was shot in my GREEN ROOM. I had my very own green room right next to Harley Pasternak’s green room. Which turned out to be a bit of a problem because — look at my green room door….

“Haley” looks a lot like “Harley.” So I may or may not have — okay I did! I did! — walked into Harley Pasternak’s green room instead of mine. And that’s how he and I met for the first time. Awkward. Very. Very awkward: “Hi, H-H-H-Harley! I’m H-H-H-Haley. Oops. Heh. I’m actually interviewing you later and doing that whole workout thing with you. See I walked in here because my name’s ‘Haley’? Kind of looks like ‘Harley,’ you know? Don’t you think? Okay thanx bai.”

I returned to his green room a little later to interview him about fitness and celebs and why I can’t seem to lose weight — he’s not into my yoga or my veganism — and it was cool and relaxed. I got lots of goods.

And so now here’s the thing. When I left, I promised Harley that I’d get on this and do his program: I’d do his 25 minute workout DVD with the “Harley Bar” (both of which I received care of The Shopping Channel) 5 times a week, and I’d eat 5 times a day — as per his 5-factor program — and, finally, that I’d lose 25 pounds, to which he replied, “Don’t put a number on it.” Okay no number.

But, see, here’s the thing: not only did I make this promise to Harley Pasternak, but I’ve made it BIG TIME to Today’s Parent Magazine. In the November Issue of Today’s Parent, you will see a finally FIT and HEALTHY me…. It’s set in stone in the editorial calendar. And we’re shooting my “AFTER” PHOTO in April.

So it’s officially ON. For years now, you’ve been hearing about my dieting trials and tribulations. And enough is enough. I mean, when I got a new boss a few months ago, I felt compelled to tell her I wasn’t pregnant so she wouldn’t wonder about it. And that’s just not okay. Not okay. I’m tired of looking pregnant. Yes, my pregnancies were emotionally and physically traumatizing. But it’s time to shed it all and move on.

The training has begun. I’m still doing my daily Ashtanga Vinyasa yoga (it is NOT EASY, Harley) and eating vegan. But I’ve added a few more healthy meals in there — which is doing wonders for my apparent hyperglycemia — and Harley’s 25-minute 5-factor workout DVDs. Apparently, even Lady Gaga (another one of Harley’s star clients) works out for 25 minutes, 5 days a week (unless she happens to have extra time on her hands). You’d think these celebs worked out for hours. But Harley says no.

I think that’s all for now because, man, I’m writing a book here. But I will say this: Jennifer Hudson has Weight Watchers (and Harley Pasternak) behind her, and look at her! And now, very thankfully, I have Today’s Parent behind me. And maybe that’s what it’ll take to DO THIS THING. An “after” picture in a magazine: now that’s motivation! *Shivers.* I think it’s ON, Gorgeouses! Yes, it’s ON!

So, your turn. Want to join me? I WILL post your before and after photo right here if you want it…. Do it do it!

Love!

xo Haley-O

Photo source


I’m sick as a….

Look at her. She just got groomed, and she’s nervous I’m going to steal that way-to-go-you-just-got-groomed congratulatory bone from her. It is vegetarian, but I’m not that hungry. In fact, being sick as a DOG, I’m not hungry at all.

I feel like arse, Gorgeouses. ARSE. I’ve been home from work for two days with this wretched cold, and I could probably use another two days. But, you know, I’m not contagious anymore, and there’s work to be done at my gorgeous job. So I’ll return — tea and tissues in hand — tomorrow, hopefully after a good night’s sleep (which, truth be told, I’m not convinced is possible with my current nose situation).

Speaking of tissues (or not, sorry segues are allowed when you’re sick, don’t you think?), bandanna? or no bandanna?

(Oy, do you LOVE our Betty White?) What do you think of the bandanna? Yea or nay? The groomers gave it to us for free. And I think it might stop her from masticating to oblivion her dog tag (which can’t be good for her).

That’s all for now. On top of the fully stuffed nose, the throbbing head and the curious fiery sensation in my esophagus, the aches in my neck and shoulders — umm, I totally forget what I was just going to write.

Love!

xo Haley-O

P.S.: Ashtanga Yogis out there? Are you practicing your primary series when you CAN’T BREATHE?

P.P.S.: Please note my new email address – haleyonlineATgmailDOTcom. Cawl me!

P.P.P.S.: How do you spell “yea,” as in “yea or nay”? I googled the carp out of it because some people say it’s “yay,” and I got all sorts of answers, and neither “yay” nor “yea” are in my dictionary — either is yey….


One of the perks of being the celebrity blogger at Today’s Parent is that I get to be “press” at international events — like the Toronto International Film Festival, which has brought the likes of Ed Harris (*swoon*), Katie Holmes and Suri Cruise, Jennifer Connelly, Ryan Gosling, Ryan Reynolds, Kevin Spacey, Kelly Preston, Scott Speedman and, ohhh, most celebs I can think of, to our fair city. Unfortunately, the TIFF organizers placed the film festival smack-dab in the middle of the Jewish High Holidays. So I’ve been missing most of the action…. When I went to pick up my pass mid-festival, the peeps behind the desk were a little, like, “huh? whah? who?”

You know, though, that’s okay. I got the press pass, and it was really exciting, Gorgeouses!

(Pardon my nails. Manicures are at the very bottom of my priority list these days…. If only I inherited my mother’s manicure and haircut discipline. Nope. BUT, I do shower daily.)

I loved the press junket. That was so thrilling for me. People were buzzing and stressing and schmoozing….

I know the photo doesn’t show much (bygones!) — I really should get an iPhone if I’m going to be “press.” But you can see all the Macs in the background, no? And, seriously, it’s hard to take pictures with your shoddy blackberry while a very little man is practically pulling your pants down to get your attention, screaming “I’M HUNGAWY! I’M HUNGAWY!” (I had JUST fed him.)

The press could have cared LESS about the very blond little thing in the very big yellow top that I brought to the junket….

There we are in the hotel lobby. I appeased him with a few pennies to toss in the apparently fascinating water fountain. Luckily he didn’t toss any in a journalist’s Starbucks cup…. Though there were a few close calls.

Nope. I didn’t see a single celeb. But I spoke to some producers, and I got familiar with the scene and what to do when you’re press…. All great prep for next year when, I just learned, my press privileges will increase. Yeehaw!

I’m not celebrity obsessed at all, though, contrary to popular belief. I just love writing about celebrities because it’s fun and light and makes people smile. But I don’t regret that I missed seeing Ed Harris (*crush*) or Keanu Reeves because the kids didn’t want to leave the schoolyard and I got stuck in traffic.

And now to bed. I’m so tired that I bought TWO diet books today — and ate a bowl of sugary dry cereal for dinner.

The little Rascal, as friggin’ adorable as he is….

…He’s been keeping me up at night. Sending me on water runs in the middle of the night and insisting on sleeping TOTALLY on top of me. ARRRGHH!

Between the not-eating-well and the not-sleeping — OH! and the TIFF — I look like carp. I need more than a manicure. I need a complete spa day, spa week, alone, in Arizona…. Complete with BLISS and coconut smelling things.

So there you have it. I hope a little repetition didn’t bore any of you who’ve been reading Celebrity Candy…. It’s fun over there — click on the GOSSIP link at the top of the page to checkit regular, ‘kay? Thanks!

To bed! No edits. Love! xo Haley-O


The couple months have been crazy for me. Recap: tooth trauma, new job (aka lifestyle overhaul), new dog “Betty White” (aka lifestyle overhaul), new nephew, loved one in hospital (was released TODAY). I think it’s time for a little mundanity, don’t you? Checkit….

I just ate a slice of raw vegan strawberry cheesecake from Live. It’s yummy, but a little too walnut-y. Someone snuck a cheaty little taste before I could slice into it.

There’s a family of cardinals living in our backyard. Deep inside this tree….

It’s rare that you see a female cardinal, you know. But we see the mama bird all the time. Isn’t she beautiful?

I watched the daddy cardinal feed the baby — beak to beak. Amazing. Needless to say, Betty White’s not allowed in the backyard when the birds are hunting. I hardly want her near MINDEN….

(legs….)

(she wears short-shorts….)

In the course of writing this post, my children have come down the stairs four times.

The Rascal and I went on a moonlit midnight walk with Betty White just last night….

Tonight he’s wearing a Paul Frank T-shirt and bathing-suit shorts to bed. I asked him why he was wearing bathing-suit shorts, and he said because “I yike to, Mama.”

The Monkey says “babing suit” instead of “bathing suit.” and I like it better. Really. Otherwise the Monkey’s quite articulate.

I took Monkey, Rascal and Josh-O to the office the other day to retrieve the whatchamacallit I dropped down the elevator shaft in front of an elevator full of men — all heads bobbed as the whatchamacallit bounded off the elevator ledge and into the shaft (plop). Facilities went down, way down, and got it for me.

This is what they did at 4pm on Father’s Day….

Josh-O’s a great dad. Too bad he doesn’t read my blog. Or is it? If he did read my blog, I wouldn’t be able to call him a nutball, or tell you about the astronomical parking ticket I got illegally parking in front of Starbucks the other day — which I totally just quit, again, just now — now would I? He’s laughing at me right now because I couldn’t figure out that my whatchamacallit thingy I dropped down the elevator shaft is called a “parking pass.”

This morning, at work, I wrote about Kim Kardashian’s cleavage of the buttocks. When I took breaks, I spun around in my chair and looked at the great view by my desk….

Did you know ornithology is the most popular hobby in the world? Loved One told me when had brunch at the hospital yesterday morning. Apparently heard it on the radio.


I’m struggling a weee bit to keep my head above water. In a good way, though. Like, today, I’ve been busy having a blast over at — *drum roll* — CELEBRITY CANDY, my new celebrity blog at TodaysParent.com! We’re working on the format a little, so you will see some awesome changes soon. But, it already feels like HOME.

Some of you remember I gave up celebrity blogging after Rascal was born because, well, something had to go. But, as soon as I started my first Celebrity Candy post just yesterday, it felt like HOME.

Of course, you won’t find much celebrity snark from me. I’ve always been a bit of a goody-two-shoes when it comes to celeb blogging (except for that darn Worst Celebrity Feet post that brings hundreds of visitors here every day — gahh!). And Today’s Parent likes to keep things positive. So we are, indeed, a match made in heaven — laaa!

What else? I’ve also been busy writing tons of articles. I honestly haven’t written this much since grad school. And, again, all this writing feels like HOME.

Want to check my stuff? I promised I’d keep you posted. Here are the latest online articles by me (on MSN and/or TodaysParent.com):

1. Help My Kids Are Out of Control

2. Bringing Sexy Back

3. How To Dress Like a Hot Mama This Summer

4. Still Carrying the Baby Weight?

Stay tuned, too, for my first PRINT article — in the August issue of Today’s Parent!

THAT’S what I’m up to at work. And more. And more. And more. More later, including très cool pics of the office that I’ve been meaning to share for, like, weeks now!

Love!

xo Haley-O

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