“Are you anxious and lacking self confidence?”

Excuse me, appropriately-timed SPAM EMAIL, you talking to me? YOU tawkin’ to ME?

Apparently, so.

“Are you afraid that women may look down on you? Are you worried about your friends laughing at you in the locker room? Then [BlahBlah] penis enlargement pills is the solution for you.”

Maybe not. That’s okay. Anyway. That all caught my attention.

At this very moment, I am anxious and lacking self confidence. The BlahBlah Penis Enlargement Company couldn’t have put it better. And it’s okay that the entire world knows it.

See, I am so transparent. Sometimes I’m embarrassed about how much I put out there online and in real life, YES. But, then I remind myself that that’s what I’m here — as in ON THIS PLANET — to do. And then I remind myself that there are others who ALSO put themselves out there and do quite well….

heidi-montag-and-spencer-pratt

(I’m actually a fan of Spencer Pratt, by the way. You love it.)

Certainly, we could all use a little more transparency in our lives — and there’s nothing like a good buzz word. TRANSPARENT. Which sounds remarkably like trans-parent. Hmmm, what to make of that?

By the way, I have a new tick: I say “certainly” all the time now. It’s a little worrisome.

And, no I’m not drunk.

Where was I? (As Rascal would say:) “Oh.”

At this very moment, I am anxious and LACKING IN SELF CONFIDENCE. But, seriously? Who the f*ck has so-called high self-esteem, or even normal self-esteem? What woman? Give me her contact info. We should toooodally have a CONVO.

Except my daughter.

My daughter has amazing, inspiring self-esteem. And, in recognizing the sorry state of my own self-esteem, I’d say she and her stellar self-esteem are in GOOD HANDS (look at that high parenting self-esteem, doncha knowww). Because I know all the red flags. I catch them in myself, like, every minute, and I take a deep breath and roll my shoulders back and say “f*ck it” and “I can do this.” Awareness, man. It’s the key to everything.

Yooooga.

Ujayiiiiii.

Also, at this very moment, like right NOW, I’m very very busy. In the middle of work CHAOS, actually. Too busy to be reflecting on my psychology, on my issssues. And it’s making me a weeeeeeee bit CARAZAY! (Did you notice? Tell me it’s not noticeable.)

So, FINALLY, I interrupt this blog to give you a little something to look at while you think about your self-esteem. What’s your self-esteem looking like lately? Are you HARD on yourself like I am? Or, are you someone I need to have a CONVO with….?

Here’s the something to look at:

IMG_0022

I know, you’ve ALL seen this picture before. And you totally remember it. Heyyy, how could I use an old picture? I’m so bad. Such a bad blogger. La la la. I’m too busy to look for a cute new one.

Here’s something else for you, though – on optical ILLUSION:

IMG_1850

Here’s the illusion (it’s très coo): if you stare at this photo of MARGE! long enough, you’ll start to see this:

gollum

I’m going to bed. Early. Someone needs sleep. Big time.

Love…

xo ahalywe0p

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