We all know kids say the strangest things. And we love it. It keeps us on our toes, keeps us laughing, makes us think. Lately, though, I’ve been loving that they constantly DO the strangest things. The Monkey, in particular, has always had strange fascinations and formed bizarre attachments to the most random things. Ever since she could make fists with her sticky little baby hands, she’s never left home without a stuffed animal, a plastic spoon, a doll’s boot, a plastic egg, a random bead…. There are no limits to her strange fascinations.

I’ve collected a few of the strange (or just too-cute) things she AND her cheaty little brother have done lately….. Check it!

1. Yesterday, Monkey turned elastics into EARRINGS….

2. Rascal CONSTANTLY plays trains in DADA’s shoes (FUN — and EW!)….

3. They clobber the cat (hmmm, wonder whom they got THAT from)….

3. They hurt their nose when clobbering the cat, and then they BLAME the CAT (wonder where he got THAT from)…. SPOON!?

4. The MINDEN, of course, is NEVER impressed….

5. And, like I said, they (well, just Monkey) form bizarre attachments to the most random things….


A sippy cup top, a SHRIMP, a baby-doll bottle, and, my personal favourite, the most phallic toy banana EVER….

6. And, (just today) they choose the most random thing in the entire toy store to bring home. Yes, I told Monkey to choose any toy she wanted (within reason) for helping her friend at school when he fell and for helping mama teach yoga the other day…. In the entire toy store, THIS is what she chose, Godhelpme:

Unfortunately, it was $7…. $7!? I was not happy. And, unfortunately, it’s sitting, unworn, on my dining room table. In the meantime, Monkey’s running around in that bathing suit again….

Let’s cut to the chase here — because I COULD go on and on. Monkey collects her favourite random things daily and places them on her radiator — where she can play with them out of Rascal’s reach…. If you look closely, you’ll see one item that’s a little, erm, uncomfortable….

EXHIBIT THE FIRST (yesterday)

Close up….

EXHIBIT THE SECOND (last night)

Close up…

EXHIBIT THE THIRD (this morning): “Look, Mama! It’s a helicopter!”

Me: What’s that white thing you’ve been playing with?
Monkey: A bottle stick.
Me: What’s it for?
Monkey: You put it in a bottle and it makes a helicopter!

Niiiice….

Children say, and do, the strangest things. And, sometimes — like last night — you realize just what trouble you’re in because of it. Like, when he hurts his nose and blames the cat, and you say “UH-OH,” and she says “F*CK!”….