This Mercury Retrograde is ALL OVER me. First, my sidebar, then…MY CAR (don’t ask), then some other stuff I can’t think of, and now my whole website. It’s been down all night, and I planned to have another early night. So, this is it. Going to bed. But, I am thinking about a few things lately….
1. Is it more important to eat to live or live to eat. Like, is going on a 21-day cleanse à la Kathy Freston WASTING 21 days of potentially eating REALLY AWESOME FOOD (*cough* CHAI LATTE *cough*), or will it, indeed, change my life like it did an old friend of mine who just contacted me and told me about her newfound vegan, caffeine- and sugar-free bliss?
2. I’m obsessed with improving myself. Why can’t I just accept the way I am? Is everybody like this? Is everyone totally incapable of accepting themselves as they are?
3. Can’t I just wake up tomorrow — after HOPEFULLY a good night’s sleep (grrr…, Rascal SCREAMING in the night) — and doggone it accept myself and all my flaws?
4. Don’t you get sick of coming here and listening to me kvetch sometimes? (DON’T ANSWER THAT!)
5. But, then, if I didn’t kvetch, would you come here? (DON’T ANSWER THAT!)
6. If some people have better or more popular blogs than me and my Cheaty Monkey, it does NOT mean they’re more important or better moms or significant-er people than me. It does not mean that I’m somehow less intelligent or less of a writer. I was done with popularity contests in high school.
7. Not sure why I blog lately. It’s an outlet. It’s an out-reach. Not a competition….
8. I’m going to do the cleanse….
9. 21 days….
10. 21 days to a better, healthier, NOT HOOKED, sugarless me…. I’d just give anything to NOT be HOOKED on something. It’s not the drink — the GRANDE SOY NO-WATER TAZO CHAI. It’s the HOOKAGE. It troubles me. I’m done with hooking. That ship has SAILED.
11. Ticker….
12. I can’t get this to work. Help? Anyone know a good ticker site for this?
13. Not a bad luck number. Okay to end here. Time to take risks.
What are YOU thinking about?
Love! xo Haley-O
Zoey Castelino said, January 20th, 2009 at 4:21 am
Always interesting to hear what you have to say.
And yes, 13 is not a bad-luck number 
LD said, January 20th, 2009 at 8:27 am
I feel the same way all the time.
I read your blog because you’re honest and open. Not sure which blog you’re referring to as more popular, but I do find that the more popular blogs become the more of a celebrity blog writers seem to think they are and then they change. That bugs me.
LDs last blog post..Overwhelmed
Chantal said, January 20th, 2009 at 8:53 am
I have been in turmoil myself these days. I have gained a bit of weight. Not happy about that. Not happy with my work. I held my breath yesterday and finally sent out a resume. I have issues with change. I have had 3 jobs in the last 13 years but they have all been with the same employer (so no real change there). I feel like I am on the cusp of a big change, but I don’t know what it is yet, and it is driving me batty.
Chantals last blog post..Corner of shame
Rosebud & Papoosie Girl said, January 20th, 2009 at 9:45 am
With a week and a half to go I am certainly all over the place…can I blame Mercury too or is it the hormones? I think you always seem to know what path to take and by trusting your judgement you show faith in your own abilities.
Hope today is a good one!
Rosebud & Papoosie Girls last blog post..Ahead of the curve
JavaChick said, January 20th, 2009 at 10:37 am
What am I thinking about….I have been thinking about the fact that I am a people-pleaser and I always want to do everything to make other people happy, even if that interferes with what I want/need. It’s not bad to want to make other people happy, to do for other people, but I need to learn how to say no sometimes, to stand up for myself when I need to…That is what I am thinking about.
JavaChicks last blog post..Quick Weekend Recap
petitegourmand said, January 20th, 2009 at 10:53 am
# 4. never!
always entertaining.
I’m all about continuous self improvement (minus the cleanse concept) I just don’t think I could do it.
but good luck- especially with the lattes.
We cannot become what we need to be, remaining what we are.
Max Depree
workout mommy said, January 20th, 2009 at 11:48 am
I love your honesty and I can SO RELATE to your struggles. (both with your diet and the monkey and rascal!)
I’ve been trying to kick sugar myself for so long, maybe we can help each other?
workout mommys last blog post..5 ways to keep warm,save money, and get fit!
Maria said, January 20th, 2009 at 11:53 am
I read bcus it’s like checking in with a friend daily – you’re just like the rest of us & I luv it! I read this the other day & loved it…
“Wanting to be someone else is a waste of the person you are” Kurt Cobain
LAVENDULA said, January 20th, 2009 at 12:44 pm
Haley you are so awesome! if the cleanse isn’t to hellacious maybe i will try.since going vegan i have really reduced my sugar intake.my older kids think i’m funny because if i have like a glass of pop or a tablespoon of sugary jam i get a sugar buzz hahaha!Haley you don’t have to change anything because you are pure and beautiful as are!hugs to you man i’m really feelin the love lately people!
DONNA said, January 20th, 2009 at 1:06 pm
I really enjoy your blog, you are always finding ways to improve yourself, I do feel you are way to hard on yourself, ease up a bit , stop beating yourself up. I think you eat way more healthy than ALOT of people, my self included. I think you are awesome!
Phyllis said, January 20th, 2009 at 4:05 pm
Why don’t you consider a cleanse that doesn’t deprive you of the foods you want to eat for three weeks?
I did a cleanse by DrFloras and it worked wonders for me… and there are probably others as well.
mich said, January 20th, 2009 at 5:56 pm
I just started day one of my 2 week cleanse. I do the whole body cleanse by enzynamics?. It is great. I will be eating just cutting out dairy(which is huge for me), caffeine(another huge one), wheat, soy etc. I did it 3 yrs ago and I felt great. In my opinion, I think it is necessary for you to eat especially because you are so active with Monkey and Rascal. Anyway, good luck with what ever you decide. Thanks for the heads up about the mercury in Retrograde.. car troubles are what I have experienced so far. Love your sight and your honesty.
mich said, January 20th, 2009 at 5:57 pm
Oopps it was supposed to be site but then when I thought about it.. i would like it to be insight!
erin said, January 20th, 2009 at 8:11 pm
I agree with a lot of readers that based on your blog, it seems as if you are far too hard on yourself. I am anti-cleanse in such a huge way. It is just not a sustainable way to approach good health. It’s completely faddish (is that a word?). Damn you Oprah and your gullible minions!
Also I don’t know if you’re like me but I generally make good food choices but once I restrict myself in any way shape or form it makes me want whatever I’m restricted from more and it brings out all sorts of terrible self-hating eating disorder tendencies that I thought I left behind. At this stage in my life (full time job, 1 & 3 year old where my 1 year old is also not even close to sleeping through the night), I just do the best I can everyday without punishing myself. Sometimes I eat well and sometimes I enjoy a cookie or 2 and sometimes I get out for a run and sometimes I sit on the couch and watch Y&R (how good is that lately, god I love it so much). It’s all good and tomorrow is always a new day.
Teena in Toronto said, January 20th, 2009 at 8:27 pm
Let me know how the cleanse is. I need to do one.
I use Tickerfactory.com … check ‘em out
Teena in Torontos last blog post..Monday workout
THE RASCAL WALKS! | Cheaty Monkey said, January 28th, 2009 at 12:05 am
[...] all day long. I am exhausted. What’s worse, this is the first official Terrible Tuesday on my 21-day cleanse (because last Tuesday was Day 1, and Day 1 doesn’t count because Day 1’s of cleanses [...]