SHHHHHHHHhhhhhHHHHHhHHHHH!!! (And, excuse the sickie hair — I’m still blahhhhhhCHEW!)

He’s sleeping. He’s finally SLEEEEEPING! LOOOOOK:

But, you have to be QUIET, like DON’T BREATHE, or he might wake up. And, I’ve been s-s-s-sitting here for an hour AND A HALF trying to get him to sleep. And, every time he starts to nod off, MISS THANG (aka, that cheaty little MONKEY) bursts into the room screaming, “MOMA!!!”

Also what happens is MAAAAAARRRRGE starts meowing: “Ree-a-a-a-ah! Reh-ah-ah-e-ow!” Can you say, “WEIRDEST. CAT,” and how ’bout “EVER”???????

She can’t take a picture for the life of her. She freaking closes her eyes every time. So, I’ve given up.

…Unlike, my little Meeeeeenooooote, who takes the BEST pictures. Of course…because he’s PERFECT:

OY OY OY!!! And, in case you were wondering, Minden made a home in the totally comfortable-looking (I knowww) toy drawer….

Yes, I would TOTALLY curl up in there if I could fit. It just OOZES comfort. Plush, glorious, cottony comfort…. Mmmmm….

Anyway, I’ve been trying to get Rascal to sleep in his crib for naps AND at a reasonable bedtime hour. He’s 10 months already, ahem, so I think it’s time.

Yes, it’s time for a number of things — after the HELL that was last week. Here’s just the beginning, and I’ll elaborate throughout the week when my own bedtime isn’t looming, pulsating, on the horizon:

1. I’m the MOTHER gosh dangit!

2. MY CHILDREN ARE NOT THE BOSSES OF ME!!!

3. Rascal’s day and schedule can no longer be a by-product of the Monkey’s.

4. Rascal will have at least one nap in crib, and screw the LET HIM CRY because, as you can probably tell from that whole hour-and-a-half-getting-him-to- sleep-tonight thing? I can’t do it.

4. I create the day.

5. I need to compartmentalize my day and myself so I can be MORE PRESENT in each thing that I do (hmmm…, where was I…? Heh) — BIG ONE.

6. Monkey’s birthday party is costing us an ARM. and a LEG. OOPS. MY. BAD. Just saying. But, I scored this table for her for $45 (I brought it down from $60 — Niiice)! She is very excited about her BIRTHDAY PRESENT! Check it….

…which leads us to 7….

7. Those things on the table? They’re angels. And, yes, we ARE Jewish. It’s just they’re 25 cents and Monkey LOVES them…. And, they’re SPARKLY (and you know I’m a sucker for the sparkly…!). Closeup on “Mirna” and “Schmirna”:

Weirdest thing, by the way? I practiced yoga late at night last night. I was doing a really standard twist. Like, nothing fancy. But, I was able to twist just a WEE bit farther than I usually do. And, it made me CRY! It’s like I SQUEEZED the tears out with the twist. Kind of like wringing the water out of a sponge. I’ve heard of this happening in yoga — but not from a twist…. I KNOW it had to do with the sacral chakra…. But, I won’t get into it here. It was AWWWWESOME. I was AMAZED. I’m going to try it again tonight because it was soooo wild.

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