Okay. I’m officially on board now.

Time to get into the groove of HEALTHY living.

Really, it isn’t until one sits down with one’s GORJ and SO-SWEET personal trainer that one realizes how FAT-PROMOTING one’s diet is….

A blueberry muffin a day makes a muffin top YES WAY….

…and how much more EFFICIENT one’s exercise program could be….

If Jennifer Garner and Heidi Klum can lose all their preggers weight and look GORJ, SO CAN I. Especially because, like MY FELLOW celebs, I have TRAINER!

Trainer is awesome.

Today, we started our session by sitting down and talking diet. Trainer devised the following plan:

Haley-O will eat 5 small meals a day.

Haley-O will include protein in each meal.

Haley-O will not have carbohydrates in the evening (because that’s when metabolism is sloooooowwww.)

Haley-O will not eat bread…urrgh. Rice and whole grain pastas are fine…during the day.

If Haley-O gets hungry in the evening, she will have a light snack, for example, a tablespoon of peanut butter with celery (peanut butter mmmmm…; celery ewwwww).

Trainer’s going to email me the finer points of the plan. And, she said it’s coo if I want to share it with the Cheaty Gorgeouses.

Omigosh! I almost forgot the best part!

Haley-O can have a CHAI TEA LATTE every day if she wants! She simply must count it as one of her 5 meals — not the healthiest part of Haley-O’s diet. But, oh-so-good for Haley-O’s soul….

Hmmph, cheaty little monkey!

Face it, we ALL know I fell back off the chai-tea latte wagon when I had that very first chai tea latte of 2008…on my so-called “cheat day”…. And, face it, after an itty bitty while, “Cheat Day” was fast becoming “Every Day,” ahem…. But, now I have Trainer. And, she’s SAVING THE DAY.

After talking diet, Trainer took me through my weight training circuit. I worked legs, then chest and arms. Then we did abs ON THE BALL, just like this….

15 regular crunches and 15 to each side. Brillers. I am now officially a lover of BALLS.

Trainer is wonderful for many reasons. One of those reasons is that she lets me COUNT. I do all the counting when we exercise. People look at us funny.

Trainer says I can actually get back to my size 2 prepreggers bawd if I stick to the plan! We might even lose those nagging last 50 pounds (heh) by the summer, Gorgeouses!

Monkey’s been shouting THIS all afternoon:


Please don’t call Child Services….

But, then! Like, just now! She caressed my face ever so softly and said:

“I’m being gentle to you, Mama. I love you Mama….” {swoon!}

I’m going to Italy…. Come back tomorrow, and MAYBE I’ll get around to telling you why…. Hint, LD’s comment on yesterday’s post.

Go check Cheaty’s SAG Award fashion hits and misses over at….