Okay.
Hello. I have a problem.
My procrastinating is getting out of hand.
Hold on a sec. I have to go get a drink of water. No seriously. I’m thirsty. (Really.) You want one?
So, yes. For example, every time I have to leave the house these days (even if it’s for something as important as picking the monkey up from school), there’s always A MILLION little teeny things to do that HAVE TO BE DONE THIS MINUTE EVEN IF I’M LATE!
Hold on a sec. I have to attack Minden. He’s driving me crazy just sitting here sleeping.
LOWER LIP! That plump pink lower lip kills me. I want to KISS it but ew.
As I was saying, I do a million LITTLE things before I leave the house until I’m officially late. And, know what’s worse? I literally move in slow motion. My feet start to drag and I take the long route up the stairs to grab my cell phone (which I so don’t need because EVERYONE knows I always forget it or have no battery left), or to change my shirt, or grab ONE MORE diaper for the rascal, like, just in case….
I’m so not kidding about the slow motion….
Oh carp, rascal’s crying. Just when I finally sit down to WRITE something. Figures. And, now, I’m WRITING in slow motion because he’s crying and I KNOW I have to get him and I’m just ALWAYS PROCRAAAASTIIIINAAAATIIIIIIIIIING.
got him. wwriting ony handed. hate writing one hnadked. oh carp again! he hates when i type while he;s nursung.
I forget what I was saying before SOMEONE demanded a BOOOOOBIE. Something about procrastination. It has to stop. Just like nighttime eating (the BANE OF MY EXISTENCE — ONLY THING KEEPING ME FROM LOSING MY PREGGERS WEIGHT).
‘Kay LOOK at how unproductive and self-destructive I am, really? You think I have my sh– together. AS IF I can handle these two kids, AS IF I get stuff done. I don’t. I so DON’T have it together.
I WALK SLOW WHEN I’M IN A HURRY? Classic self-destruction.
Oh dang. I forget where I was going with this. Something about chai teas.
Wait. Pictures. We just took pictures….
Ewww. My nose. And, what’s with the crooked smile…? Oh, yes, rascal. He looks so cute and…. My nose is NOT bigger than his whole face in real life. Really, I have a small nose. Seriously. It’s small. Except in pictures.
‘Kay, never mind THAT YAWN (oyyy!). Look at MY HAIR! Do you have ANY IDEA how badly I need a haircut? ANY? Well, I guess you do now.
Oh yeeeahhh. The spit up. On my brand new shirt. Fabulous. I got it goin’ ohn.
So, Gorgeous Adele asked me how my no-chai-tea-lattes-in-2008 resolution is going. So far, I’ll have you know, I’ve had NO CHAI TEA LATTES IN 2008! I’ve been GREAT! I’ve officially replaced that sweet, comforting, heaven-in-my-mouth beast with tazo chai tea BAGS and a wee bit of skim milk.
Now, if only I could break my brand new hot chocolate addiction…. Freaking dang it.
I destruct myself. A regular Britney Spears….
NEWSFLASH: I went to the gym today and did half an hour on the elliptical machine and left BOTH monkeys at the gym daycare and they did GREAT.
NEWSFLASH THE SECOND: I think I have shin splints….
NEWSFLASH THE THIRD: The RASCAL HE ROLLS (from back to side)!
NEWSFLASH THE FOURTH: …making it very hard to change his stinky diapies….
And, hey, thanks SO MUCH for commenting yesterday. I LOVED hearing from so many new (and long-time) readers. You make me so happy! LOVE! LOVE! LOVE!
To repay you for your kind words, I give you GOSSIP! Check it!
shroom-monkey said, January 11th, 2008 at 8:02 am
I am first!!!! that is all I have to say…. number one, number one, number one!!!! suckas!
lauraldawn said, January 11th, 2008 at 8:19 am
I love love love the yawn picture.
So adorable.
And, whatever you do, don’t go get your haircut at the same place you did before
multi-tasking mommy said, January 11th, 2008 at 8:32 am
I think you look beautiful and your rascal, well, he’s just adorable!
Shin splints hurt so much–I’ve had them before, yuck! I’m so sorry.
Good for you for going to the gym! GREAT job.
He’s rolling over, lots of fun!!!
Yesterday, the bunny had her first ballet class in 3 weeks. We were running late, I rushed as fast as I could to get ready and would you believe, we were the first ones there? Crazy!
Jenifer G. said, January 11th, 2008 at 9:09 am
I think you need to cut yourself some slack…this might the pot calling the kettle or whatever…anyway the first months are hard and exhausting and the fact that you even went to the gym once is a miracle. No matter what people say or blog – behind closed doors is usually another story. You are a doing a great job, anyone can see that.
Heather said, January 11th, 2008 at 9:15 am
I feel for your procrastination pain ! Seriously, I was reading and saying ‘yes, I do that too, yes, yes, that’s so me !’ Except that I do it without babies. I think I will have to blog about my self destruction as well.
Example ? I have 45 minutes before I absolutely have to in order to no be fired be at work yet I’m commenting on your blog…..
xxx
Adele said, January 11th, 2008 at 9:21 am
Juggling two kids is hard. Cut yourself some slack. It will get easier.
Congrats on the gym- AND the no latte’s! I need some inspiration here…
Mom On The Run said, January 11th, 2008 at 9:29 am
You have the most beautiful green eyes I’ve ever seen! And good for you for getting over to the gym. I wonder how my Sierra would do if her l’il sister was there with her in childcare at the gym? Maybe better?
Sarah said, January 11th, 2008 at 9:35 am
I think you look great in that first picture….and I haven’t had my hair cut in (counting on my fingers) omg…10 months! I’ve gotta go call the hairdresser now, bye!
LAVENDULA said, January 11th, 2008 at 9:59 am
aww love those pics of you and rascal…hes so adorable.miaow minden.glad you found a replacement for the chai.who knew you could be a tea junkie.
Amreen said, January 11th, 2008 at 10:20 am
haley, you look lovely in those pics! don’t be so hard on yourself re the procrastination, it sounds like you’re still getting lots done – that’s great you went to the gym!
Renee said, January 11th, 2008 at 10:41 am
I just got my hair cut yesterday…come see the picture.
As for the procrastinating…well I used to think that I was a terrible procrastinator until I read this. My goodness! But I’m chronically early for everything.
Actually I think there is something about the drama of the whole being late thing that you like on some level. So there is really nothing we can do for you.
If you really need to be on time somewhere you can pack the diaper bag when you get back home each time. Then you’ll need a place to keep your keys, diaper bag and everything that is near your door. Keep the cell phone charger there too so when you get home you can charge.
There’s not much I can do for you dragging your feet.
allie said, January 11th, 2008 at 11:11 am
hey girl! even with puke on your shirt you look too darn cute and that boy….I LOVE THAT BOY!! no I’m not a blogger stalker…ha ha…he is the sweetest thing and stealing the spotlight…where is the girlie??? I miss her little fashionista shows!
have a great week-end!!
allie
Melinda Matheson said, January 11th, 2008 at 11:36 am
I too procratinate… like now I am at work and have some major rushes to do and here I am talking about it…eek. You know some people get a rush from rushing (thats me) I think its ’cause when you have small kids (again I have 4 “brave or stupid”) you are sooooo tired all the time that you need some adrenaline and being late gives you that ‘drive’ and hey whats that pickn on your pictures…you sound like me, my own worst critic (ignore my typos, ok yes spelling mistakes) when you look back on them you will be like ahhhhh I was so young what was it I was complaining about.
Lacey said, January 11th, 2008 at 11:57 am
Okay, totally laughing at shroom-monkey’s comment! And Haley, you are so funny! Oh, and yay! The rascal is rolling over…not so “yay” for diaper changes but still yay! Hmm…I think I say yay too much. Anywho, your pictures look great and good for you for getting to the gym. Don’t worry about that procrastination stuff…getting things done late is better than never getting them done at all (and you are def not the only one that procrastinates in this world so you have company)!
Don Mills Diva said, January 11th, 2008 at 12:02 pm
You look great – a long way from Brittany Spears girlfriend – a long way!
ali said, January 11th, 2008 at 12:36 pm
it’s what women do…destruct themselves. i should know, i’m an expert at that…but hales, you look GREAT.
also…methinks there are late people and there are on time people…it probably doesn’t matter if you have kids or babies or whatever. just embrace your late-ness!!
Sarah said, January 11th, 2008 at 2:18 pm
your a HOOT Haley .. loving the spit-up picture!
(hugs)) have a nice weekend!!
you are awesome, I envy you going on the elliptical .. I NEED an elliptical .. have to buy one!
oh .. and btw .. never ever compare yourself to Britney .. no comparison what.so.ever.
Chantal said, January 11th, 2008 at 4:03 pm
A late Delurk to say howdy. I have been so so sick for weeks… AHHHHH. I am back. You look great! Rascal looks great (and just like his dad)! HUGS!
Crystal said, January 11th, 2008 at 5:28 pm
Shucks, I missed delurking day! Well hello anyway! Don’t be so hard on yourself about the pictures. I don’t take good ones either. You are beautiful and don’t ever let anyone else tell you otherwise! And the rascal? ADORABLE! And good job with the resolution! Mine is going pretty good too. Yeah!
Crystal said, January 11th, 2008 at 5:30 pm
Oh, forgot to say, that lower lip on Minden is SO cute!
Kristen said, January 11th, 2008 at 9:09 pm
Good evening beautiful, I adore your photos, you look very sweet and young actually. And noses look bigger on camera cuz they are closest to the lens!
I am really proud of you and the latte thing. I broke down this week and have had 2 skinny vanilla bean lattes. But I have a secret reason why I justified it. Let’s just say I won’t be losing any weight in the near future.
Di said, January 11th, 2008 at 9:49 pm
You and the Rascal are gorj!!! And FYI, Rascals was the bar I hung out at in high school…yes, high school. Back in the olden days when the drinking age was 18!
YOU MUST SAY NO TO MULTI-TASKING!!! NO MULTI-TASKING IN 2008!!! Seriously, it’s what makes you feel so scattered and makes you feel like you are moving in slow motion. Trying to do too much can really wear on you…and you are a new Mommy…which by definition means you are trying to do too much!!!
Take care of yourself…first.
Drea said, January 11th, 2008 at 10:35 pm
I LOVE the last pic! hahaha. the spit up was a nice touch. You look beautiful. Just take it easy and enjoy.
My nose is an issue in pics a lot 2. I have to watch its angle
Adele said, January 11th, 2008 at 11:09 pm
Oh, and thanks for the shout out for my site!
Jessica said, January 11th, 2008 at 11:13 pm
Hey Haley! I found your site when I was pregnant with my first – and you were pregnant with the rascal! You were my inspiration then and you’re my inspiration now. It is so nice to hear someone else has the same issues (both baby and non-baby) I do. Thanks for your constant updates. I look forward to them every day!
BlondeBlogger said, January 12th, 2008 at 3:48 am
Awww, what a precious pumpkin’! He looks just like his mommy! Hope he enjoyed his boobie snack.
Karen MEG said, January 12th, 2008 at 11:11 am
Hales, you look great, don’tcha worry. I actually like your hair longer. I can’t believe how big rascal is getting…nice spit up shot!
manda said, January 12th, 2008 at 4:31 pm
I am always procrastinating! I’m the worst. I’m doing it as we speak. Anyhow, I always feel like I’m moving in slow motion. And the nighttime eating…oh.my.GOODNESS. I have to stop it.
PS. I think the photos of you and rascal are beautiful. you have an amazing complexion!
Lesley said, January 12th, 2008 at 4:51 pm
Wowsers! 77 De-lurking comments?!? Fab-u-lous!
Congrats on the no chai-teas – sorry to hear about the hot chocolate addiction. I too have turned that way since skipping the Cinnamon Dolce Latte’s. I should know better but…
Oh that yawn was just so precious
Rebecca said, January 12th, 2008 at 10:22 pm
One of my cousins had a white cat that she would kiss all the time, while wearing lipstick. That poor cat was the pinkest cat I ever saw.
Mrs. Flinger said, January 13th, 2008 at 12:49 am
You are a RIOT, woman! And I know I’m not on the previous post but I do read you often. You’re on my “must-reads” rss feeds. Because you’re hilarious.
Also, your son is ADORABLE. I wanna have a virtual playdate with him and Baby O. Oh, the rolling, I know I KNOW. We have crawling here. OY.
Kathryn said, January 13th, 2008 at 1:28 am
I’ll trade noses with ya! I have a crazy bird-beak for a nose. So pointy it’ll poke your eye out if your not careful!
I think you’re gorg! And I love that pic with the rascal yawning. Too sweet!
zenmomma said, January 13th, 2008 at 1:57 am
Your little Rascal is still so very tiny. You need to cut yourself some slack girl! You look great and you’re doing exactly what you need to be doing right now. Take a breath and enjoy this time. It goes by so fast.
AJ said, January 13th, 2008 at 9:47 am
I love the red hair. I’m so envious. I have red hair and two children who have absolutely no hint of red hair. Sigh. That’s some cute kid you got there.
Nikki said, January 13th, 2008 at 11:54 am
I love the pics of you and the rascal, they are just soo precioius!
Oh, do I know how the plump pink lower lip can kill one, I have a guinea pig who has a plump pink lower lip and it just drives me batty! LOL!
Be strong with your “no-chai-tea-lattes-in-2008 resolution” I know it’s not easy, I myself and incredibly addicted to their Caramel Macchiato – man that place is a diet killer!
Zoie said, January 13th, 2008 at 10:36 pm
Love your blog—your kids are just the cutest!!!
Maribeth said, January 13th, 2008 at 11:13 pm
That was so funny. I move in slow motion even in a hurry too. I can’t help it. If I’m cleaning and come across a picture I will stare at it for a half hour remembering the day, forgetting that I was cleaning. I really got a laugh from this one
Thanks, Maribeth:)
Teena in Toronto said, January 13th, 2008 at 11:24 pm
You guys look sooooo cute!
And thanks for the pic of Minden!
The Cheaty Monkey said, January 16th, 2008 at 12:06 am
[...] to take a food photography class because my food always looks like vomit in pictures. Kind of like my nose…. Anyway, that’s cornflake-crusted chicken and rice with vegetables. I stood there with [...]
kes said, January 17th, 2008 at 11:01 am
oh no! no sleep! yikes. my youngest was like that, at 3 months he was barely sleeping. we took him to chiro and he explaiined how the colon is like a long defalted balloon in the womb and when they are born, it gets used for the first time but sometimes it sticks together and kinks. Then he showed me how hard my boy’s tummy was. He gave him a colon massage and my baby fell asleep right then and there and continued to sleep for 7 hours, so exhausted. I had to learn how to do it and massage him every day for months after. It really helped. I hope you all get some sleep soon!!
“Is Your Bump Because You’re Pregnant or Because You Just Had Your Baby?” said, May 15th, 2008 at 4:16 pm
[...] to take a food photography class because my food always looks like vomit in pictures. Kind of like my nose…. Anyway, that’s cornflake-crusted chicken and rice with vegetables. I stood there with [...]