There’s a monster in my living room.
It’s red, yellow, purple, green and blue.
Within its mouth, one hundred orbs
Of various blinding, noxious hues.
It greets me daily when I rise
To feed my furry feline friends.
It sits here now before my eyes –
Distracts me to no freaking end….
I give you a photograph, but (WARNING) do not look at it directly, for doing so may cause blindness:
Yes, this gaudy beast is sitting in my living room. (Could you just SCREAM!) You walk into the house, and THIS is the first thing you’ll see:
Is it not monstrous? Is it not absurd?!
And, yet…. As ridiculously humungous, obnoxiously bright and terrifyingly atrocious as this thing is in my otherwise-lovely living room…, the little monkey loves it. LOVES it. As soon as she sees it in the morning, she crawls inside excitedly and kick-kick-kicks the balls ferociously! She loves to stand inside it, to store her toys in it, to play peek-a-boo through all its windows, and, of course, to pick up her fan mail:
When she’s older, she’ll do puppet shows inside it (and I will melt with proud adoration!):
Now, if only her daddy didn’t enjoy it so much…:
PEEK-A-BOO!
em said, January 15th, 2007 at 11:10 pm
It looks like a child’s paradise!
mark said, January 15th, 2007 at 11:25 pm
Where can I buy one!? Wait… how am I going to explain it since I don’t have kids? Hmmm. Maybe it’s time.
Tug said, January 16th, 2007 at 12:05 am
Oh honey, the more ridiculously humungous, obnoxiously bright and terrifyingly atrocious it is, the more they LOVE it. And you won’t have your own living room for quite some time. And you know what else? YEA FOR YOU for having it in your living room!! Monkey loves it, it’s her house, too….GOOD FOR YOU. Enjoy!!
Homie Bear said, January 16th, 2007 at 3:07 am
Great poem Haley-o! I wrote one for Michelle a couple weeks ago that has a similar opening line, but is a love poem, so quite different.
Jeff said, January 16th, 2007 at 7:17 am
Great post. When do you plan on buying a second one and “networking” them with a tunnel or two?
Melissa R. Garrett said, January 16th, 2007 at 7:40 am
Oh I would TOTALLY be in there having a great time!!
Rebecca said, January 16th, 2007 at 7:45 am
Isn’t that hilarious how our own personal sense of taste gets set aside for our children’s happiness? My kids had the same tent, by the way – until they wrecked it with the help of a family of three boys. They’re bad but I love them.
Chris said, January 16th, 2007 at 8:23 am
Dude, I’d be playing in that thing too
That’s awesome.
lauraldawn said, January 16th, 2007 at 8:41 am
I LOVE it.
But, I have to admit that I am totally comfortable decorating my living room with stuff like that (it matches the garish green walls we have not yet painted).
So cute and so fun. Nice poem.
Did you buy it or is it a gift?
mamatulip said, January 16th, 2007 at 9:30 am
A ball house!! We had one in our family room for a while…until I demanded it come down. LOL!
(Hey, I see you’re reading Life of Pi. How do you like it?)
Sparky said, January 16th, 2007 at 10:09 am
Now thats bright. Though I bet I would love one if I had kids
CSL said, January 16th, 2007 at 10:36 am
Oh that is obnoxious! No wonder your monkey loves it – mine would have, too. But we’ve graduated to things that are obnoxious in other ways – can you say ‘electric guitar’?
ali said, January 16th, 2007 at 11:16 am
i’ve got one word for you:
basement!
Dan said, January 16th, 2007 at 11:19 am
To quote you “she kick-kick-kicks the balls ferociously”. What a gal! CEO material for sure!
Sandra said, January 16th, 2007 at 12:32 pm
We had one of those for a while but my son insisted on SLEEPING in it. For 3 months. It is now loooong gone. So don’t worry, it won’t last forever
cece said, January 16th, 2007 at 2:00 pm
*lol* We had some big thing up in our living room for the longest time, too, but I just can’t remember what it was right now.
Cute picture of Daddy playing in the house.
Wormbrain said, January 16th, 2007 at 2:36 pm
Wait until she figures out that tent is really an ammo depot in disguise. Then the fun REALLY begins!
UrbanDaddy said, January 16th, 2007 at 3:05 pm
That is too much…
Can you see it from the window?
You need to tell Josh, that now his boss knows why he has been missing work. It’s not because he’s under the weather, but rather, because he’s addicted to the fun house.
Has he shown you any “puppet” shows yet?
Michelle said, January 16th, 2007 at 3:20 pm
Looks like something my kids would love that would also decrease our living space by 50%.
jenn said, January 16th, 2007 at 5:16 pm
I love it that josh gets right in there with her. So adorable! That’s the way John is, sometimes I have to remind him that we bought the toys for Kathryn and he needs to share! too cute!!
creative-type dad said, January 16th, 2007 at 5:46 pm
Wow! That thing is cool. I would be jumping in there too.
Five-alive said, January 16th, 2007 at 7:52 pm
Lucky Monkey !
Amanda said, January 16th, 2007 at 8:31 pm
Oh, that reminds me of the time that we went into the Snap UP store and just about lost Jess amongst the tunnels, tents and balls! What fun! Jeff wanted to buy those balls for Jess, but I drew the line…our tent doesn’t have a mini wall to keep them inside and WHO would be the one to keep them in one place all day I ask???
Anne said, January 16th, 2007 at 10:37 pm
your hubby looks so happy! Those ball tents are awesome. we still have ours and the girls still like to set it up.
Jill said, January 17th, 2007 at 6:13 pm
And I thought I was too old to play in my nieces’stuff like that!!
Ah! ah! Josh!!
Shroom Monkey said, January 18th, 2007 at 8:34 am
Don’t feel bad, with my oldest, we had a giant blow up ball pit that took up half the living room, she loved it, but it was an eye sore…. I wish I still had that thing for the twins, it was awesome…
Teena in Toronto said, January 19th, 2007 at 12:31 am
That looks like fun
Can I come over and play?
The Cheaty Monkey said, February 12th, 2007 at 11:11 pm
[...] As soon as the monkey got home, she hugged me, then ran to her ball popper, then into her eyesore of a tent. All while loving her brand new running shoes. Her first pair of running shoes. Like, AWWW!? I gave her blueberries and milk in that (MASSIVE) tent. Talk about HEAVEN. [...]
The Cheaty Monkey said, March 18th, 2007 at 9:55 pm
[...] Erm….A lot of you will be happy to hear we removed that MONSTER of a tent from our living room. We had to rearrange the whole room and remove a lot of crap like that because we’re selling our house…. The monkey isn’t using the tent much anymore, anyway. Some of you asked me if I know if it’s a boy or a girl. I dunno yet. (I’m only 12 weeks preggo, after all.) But, I do know I’m gonna find out the sex this time. And, yeah, I’ll let you know. You see, I didn’t find out with the monkey, and I TOTALLY knew she was a girl. The day before she was born, I told my mother: “It’s a girl, and I’m going to meet her tomorrow.” Weeeeeeeird! Many of you asked: What’s the new baby’s name going to be on this site? I have no idea! This question sometimes keeps me up at night. (Well, mostly, Minden keeps me up at night…with kisses…but anyway…oh, and all the peeing.) With the monkey, I knew she was the “cheaty monkey” right when we brought her home. I’m sure this new baby will inspire a name that’s just as wacky and catchy. So, I think I just have to sit tight till s/he arrives. [...]
Home Makeover – FINALLY | Cheaty Monkey said, December 1st, 2009 at 11:42 pm
[...] (It even once looked LIKE THIS….) [...]